The magic of feeling “meh”

After the whirlwinds of the holiday season are swept away, I find fewer excuses to avoid writing. I call myself a writer, and there comes a time when I actually need to write. But the muse of January likes to doze and offers little help to rouse me from my warm bed.

There’s writing work to be done. Currently, I’m in the middle of revisions on a YA fantasy novel. And I’ve outlined a new MG book. But it’s dark and cold at 5:00 am. I can’t start anything without coffee. And I need to clean the house. And the dogs need a walk. My ambitions are lulled by solving the daily Wordle puzzle, cuddled up in my favorite chair. Hours pass. Maybe I’ll read instead.

It’s not physical. Unlike my friends, I’ve stayed healthy during the holidays. I’m not fighting a virus or recovering from the flu. However, I can’t escape the sluggish feeling I drag with me throughout the day. Not sick, but “meh.”

Part of the “meh” is waiting for decisions on my two books on submission. Full manuscripts were requested in November for both my YA and MG books. My agent assures me we could wait at least six months to hear anything. Or not get any response at all. After the excitement of signing with a literary agent and getting ready to send out my books, the process of being on submission is “meh.”

Followed by a lot of rush-rush if I’m lucky.

So here I am. Writing my blog instead of working on my book projects. Hopefully, my brain will kick into gear and I’ll have a productive writing day. But probably I won’t. Some words will find their way from my brain to my fingers to my laptop. Tomorrow I might read them and say, “Meh. I can do better.”

But somehow I press on, hoping something wonderful will get through. That’s my job after all. Writing down the words that must be written. Hoping to pull it all together into a book that will be published. Some future January, when I’m feeling “meh,” I can walk into a bookstore and sign copies of my book. The book I persisted to write even when I felt “meh.”